Healing?

It always kind of throws me off when a doctor uses the word 'healed'. I mean, they're not supposed to do that right? I feel like it's taboo in the scientific medical world where all things must have a logical explanation to chalk something up to healing, but that's what the new rheumatologist just said to me.

First of all, he called me himself, at 7:30pm no less to discuss the results of my follow-up hip xray. That's pretty awesome. He said that he looked it over and the bone infarcts in the femoral shaft were gone and furthermore, the deterioration (or avascular necrosis) of the femoral heads (my hip joints) was completely healed. I mean holy cow, I'm having a hard time not sitting here smiling like a dorkus all alone at my computer screen!

On top of this (which I'm so trying to not get my hopes up about) is the fact that he said the ANA -antinuclear antibody- test the hematologist did in March (which is the main test for Lupus) came back negative. He said it could mean a number of things but the main thing he referred to was the fact that labs have recently switched to a much cheaper and not nearly as reliable method to test for ANA which gives false negatives for about 10% of patients. Ever since being diagnosed in 2003, my ANA has consistently been positive up until this test in March, so he's going back to look at my old lab reports. You can imagine that immediately my mind starts thinking 'oh gosh, what if it's gone? What if I'm all better? What if my life can be normal again?' Great and now I'm getting all emotional about it...lame! So, like I said, I'm trying not to get my hopes up, but what if...???

On the not so great side he said that once you have compression fractures they don't really go away ever...which is not what the neurosurgeon said, so I'm a little confused. And he said my level of vitamin D is good at 36 which I'm about to look up what exactly '36' means. He'll also continue to be my rheumatologist so I'll see him every 6 months for check ups, woohoo!

New Teeth, Holiday, and Physical Therapy

Nola's top two front teeth finally broke through in the past week. First it was her left, and then her right came through a few days later. We thought she had a runny nose/fever from teething, then it turned into a cold, then it got slightly better, then she had a fever of 102.5 and kept waking up at night crying. So I took her to the dr the next day and voila, she has an ear infection in her left ear. We started her on amoxicillan that night and so far she seems to be getting slightly better. At least no more waking up in the middle of the night crying, so that helps everyone out! * Edit * I forgot to add that she says 'mama' all the time now! It's so great, it's mostly when she's frustrated, but I totally eat it up and respond with a lot of, 'yes darling?' and 'mama's here!' Also, she was weighed at the dr and she's 19lbs 4oz at a little over 8 months old. Mmmm, I love her!

We had a lovely 4th of July except we kinda missed the big fireworks. There was a super monsoon that started around 4pm which happened to be when we were supposed to be over at our friend Herb's house for some festivities. We waited out the bad part of the storm (ie horizontal rain) and then trekked out for the party. It was pretty low key which was nice and the kiddos had a great time playing together while the adults got to play a few games. Tony managed a huge come from behind victory in Farkle and then us stragglers (me, Tony, and Herb) played a game of Qwirkle. It was really fun and I think I might have to buy it. ;) Of course, I lost as usual. So since I didn't want to end the game early, we left around 9:20 while the fireworks which I thought started at 9:15 had actually started at 9pm. Basically we saw them while we were driving trying to find a good spot to park and then right when we found one (at the eastside PCC campus) they were doing the grand finale. :/ We came home to set a few off in the backyard, but Embry was not too pleased when Tony handed her a lit sparkler and then did a nice freak out when he set off a firework fountain by the pool. That was the end to our fireworks for the night and we called it quits and went to bed.
I had my first Physical Therapy appt for my back/hips. It was basically just an evaluation and he said we're gonna work on strengthening my core muscles. I'll be going in twice a week for 4 weeks, which is good, but kinda difficult to get someone to watch the kiddos that often especially when my sis and her family are moving down here soon. Oh that reminds me, I got a call from the rheumatology office saying that my levels of vitamin D are normal. I guess that means I just keep taking the same Calcium+D that I've been taking since 2003, but that doesn't really make sense to me since if it hasn't worked very well so far then why not switch it up? Anyhow, I'll wait to get the hip xray done and see the results of that before I get all huffy about anything.

New Rheumatologist

The guy's name is Michael Mericic and he's supposed to be a rheumatologist who specializes in diseases of the bone in rheumatology...he even had a lovely book displayed in his exam room which he wrote. Overall I liked him. He's nice and he seems to know what he's talking about. He actually kinda reminds me of the hematologist, which is a good thing. Here's a breakdown of what he said:

• There doesn't seem to be any clear reason why my bones aren't as strong as normal. He asked about my past steroid use and besides being the hospital I've never taken more than 20 mg at a time for about 3 weeks at a time...so that would not cause it. Also, the steroids used in the hospital wouldn't show any damage for years to come, if at all.
  
• The CT of my hips shows white (bone is supposed to be gray) on both femoral heads and about a 4 inch section at the top of both femurs. That could either mean there's fluid in the bone, the bone is dead, or it was damaged at that point but has repaired itself.
• The CT of my hips (which was done prior to being bucked off the horse) also showed that my L4 vertebrae had a compression fracture. Weird seeing as the scans of my entire spine while I was in the hospital in Dec were completely normal except for a vertebrae in my neck. So what happened between Dec and April to my back?
  
• He ordered blood work to see how my body is absorbing vitamin D and a repeat hip xray.
  
• They don't give bone medications (like fosomax or boniva etc) to women who are pre-menopausal. I didn't catch why, but seemed like some hormonal thing.
• He didn't want to check my estrogen levels (even though I mentioned it about 3 times) because it fluctuates throughout the month and since my body doesn't show any signs of a hormonal imbalance, there's no reason to think my estrogen level isn't normal.
  
• He also does not like Benlysta. Or rather says there's no reason to like it yet. Basically, he said the studies showed that most of the time there is no or minimal improvement and since they don't know the long term effects, it wouldn't be worth it to risk taking it. Also he said it's about $35,000/year.
  
• He doesn't like the idea of kyphoplasty. Basically that was because the blind studies showed the same improvement with the procedure and the sham procedure. That just goes to show how much power your mind has over your body.
  
• He'll let me know about the blood work and xray and figure out what step to take next.
  

Almost 8 Months Old!

In 2 days Nola will be 8 months old! Time sure does fly! She's cutting her front left tooth. Tony says he can see it poking through and feel it, but I still haven't confirmed that. She was super fussy on Wed and then started getting a runny nose on Thurs (which I figured was from teething) and now she's got a full blown cold. Poor baby. I'm listening to her cough on the baby monitor right now. :/ She still isn't crawling, but she scoots around on the floor well enough and she can stay sitting up without falling over for a LONG time. She also now loves to go swimming and splash in the water when I take her out of her floatie. Pulling hair is one of her favorite hobbies and she especially likes to pull Embry's because Embry will cuddle her and give Nola the perfect opportunity to grab a fistful (or 2) of hair. She also enjoys pulling the cat's fur, but they usually don't stick around long enough for her to get much.

Father's day was this past Sunday and I think Tony enjoyed himself. Embry gave him the airplane she painted for him at Color Me Mine the pottery place and I gave him a card and a photo collage of him and the girls. We went to church that morning and then came home to eat KFC with my parents and go for a dip in the pool. Then we had cake that my mom made and some ice cream and that's about it.

Tony with the girls on Father's Day

We finally met our nephew, baby Micah James, on Sunday (6/19/11) when tony's mom and sister came down from Phoenix to visit. He's so cute! I've always had a thing for Asian babies and he's half Philipino, so needless to say, he's adorable. Embry totally loved him, as she does all babies, but she kept going up to us, pointing, and saying, 'That's Micah! He's my cousin!' Nola obviously didn't know who he was, but she seemed to enjoy being around another baby. It made me a little sad to think that she'll never get to be a big sister...

Me and Micah

Embry, Nola, and Micah

Photo of Micah in the backyard

Anyhow, I hosted my first playdate for the year yesterday. It was so fun! I didn't realize how much I missed having my mom friends over and their kiddos. I used to really stress about being judged for the state of my house, or the grease splattered behind my stove, or the ring around the toilet bowl, but I've come to realize two things:

1) these are not the things that really matter in life, and,
2) we're all just trying to do our best to make it through infant, toddler, and mommyhood. So even if we did have a second to check out our friend's glass tabletop for fingerprints and jelly smudges in between wrangling a spazzing 2 year old and comforting a teething baby, we wouldn't care because we're all just doing our best and that's all we can do.

Back to the playdate- we went swimming! It's been getting super hot here (like 110) and there's not much to do except stay inside or SWIM! It was lots of fun getting all the kiddos in the water and splashing around. Embry had a good time dumping cupfuls of water in her crocs over and over again and we all enjoyed some popsicles in the sun afterward. I'm going to attempt to host one every 2 weeks or so and see how it goes.

Nola and Ryan before swimming

Embry with her popsicle after swimming

We'd like to plan a weekend trip to Phoenix sometime soon as well. We have a thing from livingsocial for a night's stay at a resort up there that also has a waterpark, so Tony and I were going to drop the kiddos off with Dorothea and have some fun on our own. Of course I feel guilty not letting Embry join in on the fun, but she's too small for any of the slides anyway so what would be the point?

My back and hips still hurt like coo-coo-ca-choo-coo (one of our favorite phrases in this house), but I go to see the neurosurgeon on Monday and hopefully he can help me somehow. My back is also doing some weird popping kind of thing when I twist or turn in certain ways. I have super news though! The new rheumatologist's office called and said that they were going to go through my insurance even though they're not contracted with them, so woohoo! I got myself a new (and hopefully good/knowledgeable/caring) rheumy! I go see him on July 1, exactly 1 week from today. :)

Oh also, the white car is like messed up. It's something with the fuel pressure being too low so it's having trouble starting. It'd cost like $700 to fix it and the stupid car is only worth about that much money, believe me, I checked KBB...so we're kind of wavering between trying to see if Tony's dad can fix it (although that would only save us the labor costs and the parts alone are like $400), driving it like it is until it really goes kaput, or searching craigslist for a small (and hopefully not too expensive) Toyota or Honda. I'm sooo done with American cars. Sorry, but they just suck like hard core. Also, the 'maintenance required' light came on in the van. Hoping that just needs like an oil change, that's considered 'maintenance' right?!

Care Package Etc

After getting home from the long awaited appt with the neurosurgeon, what to my wondering eyes should appear? But a priority mail box from a friend not so near. It was filled with lots and lots of fun stuff from my friend Missy and her family and it made me feel so loved! Here are its contents:*not pictured: a wonderful card with messages from Missy, her husband, her brother, her sister, her mom, and her dad! Oh and Lindor Truffles!

• Neurosurgeon Visit: It went well in the regard that he was very informative and showed me my mri and ct scan from the hospital. He showed me the part where he saw bleeding around L3 vertebrae and pointed out that it was actually a clot (go figure, I can't get away from those suckers!) and it was right in the vertebrae fracture line so he was worried that if it continued, a chunk of that vertebrae would have actually broken off. Let me say I'm glad he caught that one because that sounds pretty painful. When he was scrolling through the testing I had done from the hospital and radiology ltd, he was like 'oh you got a dexa scan?' Which is the bone density scan I had just done 2 days earlier and I asked if he could look through the results of that since none of my drs had called me about it yet. So after he showed me the other stuff, he read through the dexa scan and kept saying 'Ooh. Oh. Oooh.' Like not in a good way. Then he said that I have Osteopenia. Specifically the 'socket' part of the left hip was like -1.8 and the 'ball' of that hip was around -2.4. Normal is 0, anything between -1.1 and -2.4 is Osteopenia, and anything lower than -2.5 is osteoporosis. He agreed that the bone loss could be part of the reason that my vertebrae got fractured from my fall into the soft sand. He said since I'm so young (I seem to be hearing that a lot lately) I could probably reverse the bone loss with tons of supplements and I need to have my level of vitamin D3 checked. He said it would be a good idea to do strength training to improve my bone strength and that I could start trying out yoga and really low impact things like a recumbent bike in about a week. Oh and big news is, I get to try to take care of the girls by myself starting Tuesday! Nola is about the heaviest thing I should try lifting at this point at about 16 lbs, wish me luck! Silver lining in all this is that the rheumatologist that my hematologist wanted me to see is willing to see my now even though he's not contracted with my insurance. So yay for getting away from the sucky rheumatologist I have now!
• Rheumatology Visit: eh well, you know, it sucked as usual. I don't like this guy. Basically he just checked my head for lesions because my hair has been falling out in masses since I was in the hospital the first time. No lesions. I told him I wanted to get on Benlysta (the first lupus drug to be approved in over 40 years with some amazing testimonies to it's effectiveness) as soon as humanly possible. He said that he doesn't know exactly what the point of their trials were and he's seen no reason it should be used over the other treatments they have like using cellcept or other extremely harsh meds. Hello!? Benlysta actually stops your B cells from attacking like maniacs and allows your body time to heal itself! Just the thought that at some point in my life I might be able to feel 'normal' again makes me giddy. Other than that, it's dang expensive, like 2k/month and I'm not sure my insurance would cover it.

Today was our 6 year wedding anniversary! We took the kiddos out to my parent's house at around 11am and left them there to spend the night. They're so adorable! I just want to love on them all day long! Embry says the cutest things and I laugh all the time at the crazy stuff that comes out of her mouth. Recently as a response to her doing something good, she says, 'You will be so happy for me!' The other day Tony was wearing his pajama shorts and she goes to Tony, E: 'are these your shorts?'

T: 'yes those are my pajama shorts.'

E: 'that's your butt in there!' while pointing

The cutest part though is how much she accentuates the 't's on butt. Argh, so cute!

And Nola, well, she's just adorable. I love her big cheekies and her little rosebud lips. She's got her two little bottom teeth now too which makes for even cuter baby smiles. She's doing 360 rolls all over the place and she's kinda started to figure out how to scoot herself backwards. She laughs at things Embry does all the time, it's so cute!

Anyway, I got on a tangent there. The anniversary was good! We had lunch at the Olive Garden and then did some shopping where we found great deals on workout clothes for both me and Tony. I also got a few new tank tops because not only did I need some in general but with this back brace all of my tops are super tight to pull over it and try to hide it. The shopping was hard for me, hard to stand and walk that long, but we took many breaks to sit and rest. Then we went to see 'Thor' which, surprisingly, I really enjoyed. Then we came home and our wonderful friend Katie made us a delicious pot roast (seriously, one of my favorite meals) and we watched 'Beyond Borders' from Netflix which was quite depressing, but I got an anniversary foot massage, so it was worth it.

I've been thinking a lot about life lately. Why certain things happen...I guess I won't know for a long time. In the meantime, I'm going to enjoy every second I have with those who I love, especially my kids. Recently a girl that I knew from school in Wisconsin lost one of her 6 month old triplet boys. They don't even know what happened, he just stopped breathing, I mean how terrifying must that have been for her? I can't even imagine, I don't want to, but I know it's been weighing heavy on my heart ever since I read her blog. I don't know why these things happen, but I've been making sure to love on my babies so much more because of them. Please stop by Melissa's Blog and pray for her and her family or leave a word of encouragement. Life is precious, please don't waste a moment of it.

The other night, Nola was uncharacteristically whining in her crib long after she had gone to sleep. I decided that maybe something was wrong, so I went into the nursery and checked on her. Besides having a wet diaper, she was fine, so I changed her and then sat and rocked her for as long as my back could stand. I hadn't gotten the chance to do that with her yet. I went into the hospital when she was 6 weeks old and when I got out, I could barely hold her. Then she started sleeping through the night so she never needed me. Then this horse accident happened and once again I wasn't allowed to lift her. Things happen, people get busy, but I'm determined to remember what is important in this life and make time for long snuggles and saying 'I love you' and really meaning it.

Nola is 6 Months Old!

Nola turned 6 months old on April 26! Her 2nd tooth started coming through a few days after her first. It's the other front bottom one. She seems to be in a better moood now that they've both popped through the gums. Yay! She's done a couple of 360 rolls too, so I'm sure she'll figure out soon that she can get into stuff if she rolls far enough. I'd say she's still spitting up about the same amount, maybe a smidge less, but I don't think the medicine is working as it should. She has her 6 month appt next week, so I'll ask about it then. She's doing really well overall and is sooo smiley! I love her!

Embry has been sick for about a week, but is markedly improved today. Her poo finally solidified (yay!) and she hasn't thrown up for about 36 hours, so I'd say she's over whatever it was. It started out as what I thought was a 24 stomach bug. She thew up at night and then not again for 4 days, then we tried to go camping this weekend (which she was SO excited about) and halfway up the mountain she threw up all over the back of my seat. Then 2 more times at the campsite and then I took her home to spend the night at our house where she got sick 3 more times. My mom came over the next morning with Nola (who she was going to watch at her house while we were camping) and stayed here with Embry. She got sick 3 more times while I was gone that day which prompted Tony and I to finally give in and come home from the camping trip. All in all, it was pretty much an utter failure. I guess we just weren't meant to go camping last weekend. Did I mention that the campsite was about 2 hours away? Oh well, maybe next time it will work out. That's life with kids: unpredictable.

Good news is my hips were feeling significantly better the past week or so. Although after going on a 'hike' (as in, I turned around 1 mile into a 5 mile hike) they're not feeling quite as good. I am hoping for the best for the hip thing, that was pretty bad for a while. I had my repeat chest CT scan today and should get the results in a couple days. I was supposed to have my repeat echo cardiogram too, but they called and rescheduled it for tomorrow since one of the techs was out today. I was actually supposed to have it last week, but then Embry got sick.

My Hip

The dr said this:
-the bone on the inside of both of my femurs has died, but it should regenerate on it's own based on my age
-the femoral head of my left hip (the ball part) is deteriorating but since it's not causing me a lot of pain, they're not doing anything about it
-my right hip is fine structurally, so he thinks it's bursitis and is sending me to physical therapy to teach me how to stretch it

Overall I didn't like him. Might partially be due to the fact that last time my dr told me to go to physical therapy to solve my pain issues, I ended up almost dead. Either way, he seemed condescending and I didn't want to ask him any questions or tell him about my other areas of bone pain because he didn't seem to give a rip. I asked if they shouldn't monitor the left hip to see if it deteriorates more and he said 'well if you start experiencing more pain in that hip then you should let me know.' I said, 'so it doesn't matter how much pressure I put on it, walking, running, that's all ok because you said it isn't going to break?' and he replied, 'well you shouldn't be running anyway due to your other health issues, but walking and regular activity would be fine.' So I take this to mean, I've just got to deal with the pain and move on.

23 weeks old

Nola at 23 weeks with grandpa Don

Me with Embry, Me with Nola

Embry, Me, Tony, Nola
(all about about 6 months old)

My appt with the orthopedic specialist is tomorrow morning, bright and early at 8:30. I'm excited because I'm hoping they'll have a good solution as to how to fix this pain. I'm also a bit nervous because I've gotten the response 'well, there's nothing we can do, so live with it' a lot in the past and I'm really hoping they don't say that. I forgot to mention about the pulmonologist, he said that he wants a repeat of the lung function test in a few months because it showed that the rate at which oxygen is going from my lungs into my blood is 52% and it's supposed to be at 100%. He thinks it's just because the test wasn't done very long after the whole incident so things might not be up to par just yet. Anyhow, I'm also slightly concerned because now my left shoulder, left hip, right knee, and right ankle are feeling about as good as my right hip. It's all very mysterious because remember before, like back when I was pregnant with Embry, I was getting those steroid shots in my shoulder and hip? Well, funny thing is, it's the opposite shoulder and hip now. Needless to say I'm not sleeping very well. It takes about 3 hours to fall asleep and then I roll from side to side about 15 times during the night, no joke. Tony has been giving Nola her 5am feeding so I can sleep, but I change her diaper, so after that it takes me another 1-2 hours to fall back asleep. Blah blah blah. I'll try to make a post tomorrow afternoon to update on what the dr says.

Nola is getting her first tooth! I found it yesterday on 4/20 after much feeling around and staring into her mouth while she tried to push my fingers out with her tongue. It's the front bottom left one (just like Embry) and it really helps to explain why she's been so fussy for the past week. I was really hoping she didn't actually turn into a fussy baby for good because I always brag about her being the good one. I tried to get a picture, but it didn't work out too well because the flash on my digital slr broke and I can't get the normal flash to pop up on it. She's also trying to sit up on her own. She does it in her bouncer and her swing now, she tries from laying down, but can only get her shoulders up so far. Due to the teething, she hasn't been taking very long naps which makes things a little difficult for me.

22 Weeks Old

Soooo, I don't mean to sound like a broken record here but my gosh, my hip hurts! I'm not sure how I'm going to make it till my orthopedic specialist appt on the 22nd much less do all the things that need to get done between now and then. I'm sure I'll manage, but I'm pretty sure it's just getting worse. Tony told me to call the dr but I don't know which dr to call since the one who ordered the mri is the hematologist and he doesn't need to see me anymore, my primary care dr I've only met once and she probably doesn't know about the hip yet, and the people at my insurance co clinic are hospitalists so they can't do anything. Even if I did call someone, I'm not sure what I'd say anyway...'Hi, I'm in a lot of pain. Help.' Update: called to see if they could move up my appt, they said no.

I went to see the pulmonologist last week and he said 'I'd be very very scared if you had to have surgery.' So if I do need a hip replacement, he doesn't want me to go on the heparin drip (like I was in the hospital) because he thinks that might have been part of the reason my platelets kept dropping. He also wants me to get a removable blood filter in case I were to clot while I'm off the blood thinners to keep the clots from going to my heart. He also ordered an echocardiogram and a chest ct. He said that when I had the first chest ct done, it showed some other foreign objects in my lung other than the clot, but he did say that sometimes a clot can make it look like there's more junk in there than there is. So basically he wants another one to make sure nothing else is in there. Needless to say, it wasn't a very 'inspiring' appt, but I'm glad he's actually making an effort to get stuff figured out.

Nola can roll over! She went from front to back and then the next day went from back to front. Now she seems to be doing back to front a lot and gets mad when she's on her stomach for too long. Her acid reflux meds are super hard to get her to actually swallow, so I think I might call and ask for the liquid stuff. She's still spitting up as much as ever. I think I might try real baby food soon and see how that goes. Update: asked for liquid prevacid instead (after trying to scrape all the dried disolvable tablet out of her neck folds this morning).

Nola is 5 Months Old!

I took Nola for her 4 mo check up on 3/29 (over a month late) and here are her stats:
weight: 14lbs 5oz (25-50%)
Height: 25" (25-50%)
Head: 39.5 cm (<5th %)
The dr said she should be rolling over between 4-6mos and that we should work on it with her. We hardly ever give her 'tummy time' because she spits up so much more (if that's even possible) when she's on her stomach, but we'll be starting that more now. Also, the dr prescribed her some Prevacid for her spit up issues. We upped her formula intake to 8oz every 3 hours, but she only keeps down about half of it. She gave her the dissolvable tablets and I tried to give her one this morning, hahaha, total failure. She kinda went like 'what's this?' and then started gagging and threw up all over the couch. So, we'll be dissolving it in a teaspoon of water from now on and then squirting it in her mouth with a med dropper. Much easier than cleaning the couch. I hope this helps because the poor girl is in a constant state of wetness. I mean really, I can't change her clothes as often as she soaks them and I know how gross it feels to sit in wet clothes. Bleh. Anyhow, I'll keep updating as to how it's working!

I finally got my hip mri done. After wasting a bunch of time making phone calls, I found out that the dr's office was waiting for my insurance to send them a pre-authorization before they sent the dr's order to the radiology place. Well the insurance co had sent the pre-auth straight to the radiology place, so they were waiting for the dr's order. I swear, NOBODY KNOWS WHAT THEY'RE DOING! Anyhow, so I went in yesterday morning (at 7, didn't get out till 9:25) and when the tech was getting me prepped I asked if she was going to do the dye scan. She said that since the dr didn't think I had an infection or anything that she didn't think we'd need to do the dye. Well after the first mri, she took me out and said, 'I think we better do the dye too.' This makes me wonder if she saw something on the first one that she thought might be 'wrong' and wanted a more thorough picture or maybe she just wanted to cover all her bases. They said it'd be 2-3 business days to get the results from the hematologist. I'm hoping to get some kind of answer because this amount of pain can't be deemed 'normal'.

I'm kind of sad knowing that I'll never be pregnant again.

Tony and I had our first counseling session through the peer counseling service at church. It was interesting and will probably be helpful. I think counselors have this ability to stare at someone in complete silence and not feel weird. I don't have that ability.

Allison's baby shower is this Saturday, so we'll be going up to Phx tomorrow after Tony gets home from work. I'm hoping to prep the food tomorrow so then it's ready to be cooked in Phx. I want to go to the Renaissance fair while we're up there, but we'll see if that actually happens.

I missed a Week

Well, I got the blood tests back FINALLY and good news: no TTP for me! Woohoo! There was one blood test he didn't get so he had me go get some blood drawn for that (3 phlebotomists, 3 sticks in one arm, 1 in the other = good times) and he is sending me for an MRI of my hip. Oh, the ultrasound was fine, as I suspected. Good that there aren't any clots in there (esp since my inr has been low the past 3 weeks) but he's doing the MRI in case the bone has died in which case we'd discuss a hip replacement. So, we'll see. He's a funny guy. He told me that if I planned on having more kids that I should call him so he can go out of town, ha. :) I'm kinda sad that he doesn't need to see me anymore since he's actually a good doctor and nice, but I guess that's a good thing.

Nola is still insisting on rolling about 75% of the way onto her tummy, but she cannot get her arm out from under her. She's quite adorable. My MIL just left today after being here for 6 days and it was nice to actually get a proper amount of sleep. I got to sleep in today which is a good thing since the children refused to nap at the same time today (although Embry actually did sleep which is a rarity these days). Nola is also cooing a lot more and, dare I say, possibly spitting up less. I'm not sure though, it's hard to guage, but I'm taking her in for her 4 month appt next week anyhow so I'll ask the dr about it again. For now we've been continuing to put rice cereal in with her formula. The anti-spit up formula was nasty (all chunky coming back up) and also made her constipated so we went back to the gentlease.

I had my 'I'm Alive!' Party and it was awesome. There was a moment when I was walking downstairs and I could hear all the people chattering happily, see all the lights, hear the Christmas music, and I walked past the Christmas tree with a stupid smile on my face. I was just so happy to have recreated Christmas and spend time with all of my loved ones. Of course there were some missing, but it really turned out great. We played our version of Scribblish (hilarious) and Just Dance on the Wii (also hilarious), ate delicious food (ham, turkey, meatballs, wienies, potatoes, green beans, chocolate, french silk pie, apple pie, pumpkin pie...basically all you can imagine eating at Christmas), then set off fireworks in the backyard. They went a lot higher and were a lot louder than I had envisioned, so I'm happy none of the neighbors got upset...or at least didn't tell me that they got upset. :) Oh and for the most part, everyone dressed up pretty fancy which makes me oh so happy. I LOVE getting dressed up! Oh and I got my hair cut/highlighted the day before so that also made me feel good. Now the hard part: putting away all of our Christmas decorations!