Wednesday, February 24, 2010


So I think now I'm setting myself up for a huge letdown. It's really a double edged sword because now I know that we can conceive in a 'normal' amount of time, but I'm going to be even more disappointed if I don't conceive again this month, or next month, or the next month etc. I've hardly taken any pictures over the last few weeks, so obviously, something's up!

Update on the sickness. Last Wed-Thurs I was sick in bed again. Same thing as last time, so Tony worked from home on Wed to watch Embry. Although he had to leave that night which left me to watch Embry in our room from the bed. I felt so bad because I had to throw up again while I was watching her and of course she came with me and starting crying when she saw I was sick. :( Poor baby.

I took Embry in for her 15 month check up yesterday. She's 31.5" tall and weighs 21lbs 6oz. That puts her about 80% for height and 35% for weight. I also saw the dr for my stomach issues while I was in there and he thinks it's my reflux. I find it hard to believe that reflux can have that sort of effect, but we'll see. So he's just increasing my prilosec. Bleh, I hope this helps.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Roller Coaster

Thurs, Feb 11, 2010. Period Due. 4am pregnancy test.

Thurs, Feb 11, 2010. 2pm digital pregnancy test.

Thurs, Feb 11, 2010. 4:30 pm.

Friday, Feb 12, 2010. 2pm. Family of 4 picture in the snow.

Friday, Feb 12, 2010. 3:30pm. Started spotting.

Saturday, Feb 13, 2010. 4am digital pregnancy test.

Dear Baby,
I loved you from the moment I saw that faint pink line. I wish we could have spent more time together, I know we would have had so much fun. You would have made Embry a big sister and me a mommy again. I will love you forever and I can't wait to meet you in heaven. You are my special angel.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Being Sick

Warning: this might be a little much if you have an aversion to puke stories.

So before I had Embry I had this fear that I was going to neglect my child because I would be too sick myself to take care of her properly. That's proven to be an unsubstantiated fear because as it turns out, when you're a mom, you just do what you have to do. Luckily for me, my lupus got a lot better through my pregnancy and since having Embry it hasn't returned to the horribleness that it was prior to my pregnancy. Praise Jesus.

Last week I took Embry to the dr because she had a cold, so he checked her out and said she had an ear infection. Her first one. I had a horrible sore throat so they swabbed me and said I did not have strep. We then went up to Phoenix last weekend since it was tony's sister's 18th birthday and my dad's 82nd birthday (my parents live down here, but go up to Wickenburg every year to visit friends for my dad's birthday). She seemed to be getting better over the weekend with her antibiotics and my sore throat was going away, so all was well.

Sat night we went over to my friend Jamie's house to spend the night and then go to church with her and her family at Tony's old church in Surprise. Everything was fine until about 11:30pm when I suddenly got very hot and went to the bathroom where I proceeded to throw up...then I was fine. Honestly, I don't get this. This happens about once a month with virtually no warning whatsoever then once it's done, then I'm totally fine. This is however the first time it's happened while I wasn't at home (well with the exception of Tony and my first date, you know a guy likes you when he sticks around after you vomit in front of him and hundreds of other people) and it was quite embarrassing. So then Sunday was great and we even went to Culvers after church (which is extremely greasy and delicious) and I was fine.

Then we get back here Sunday night and everything's fine. Mon I start to feel a little worse, but just nasal and chest congestion, nothing too bad. Although it was disappointing since I thought my cold was on it's way out. Tues same thing. Wed same thing until maybe 3pm. I started feeling achy and so I imagined I had a fever. Once Tony got home I took my temp, a low 100.3, and then the chills/sweats started. I took a bath to warm up and went to bed (around 7). Oddly, I couldn't sleep but was incredibly tired. Ended up watching tv and eating an apple with peanut butter and took some naproxen and tylenol for the fever. Then the aching got excruciatingly bad. It was mostly in my lower back and chest. I couldn't lay down, sit down, or stand up without doubling over in pain. I tore apart the bathroom medicine boxes to try and find something to help, ended up taking some naproxen liquid gels (that I now see expired in 2008) and went downstairs to try some other positions before heading to the ER.

Once I was downstairs, it got worse. I looked for my heating pad, but couldn't find it. Took some more Zicam flu medicine (I'm sure that was also expired) and googled my symptoms. Most things said to go to the ER and that it could be a heart attack. I can't imagine a heart attack lasting for hours, but I can imagine that's what it might feel like. So I quickly popped some aspirin (thanks Aunt Terri for sending that down last year because I never buy any) and then I went to lay down. Finally after about 1.5 hours the pain started to subside and I ended up falling asleep for about 45 minutes.

When I woke up, it was because I was extremely hot (same as at Jamie's house), so I went to the bathroom and you guessed it, threw up again. Let me tell you that if you think you might get sick, don't eat an apple before hand...the chunks are very hard to get up. Yes, I can find humor in the situation now, but believe me, last night I was not laughing. Boom, then I felt better, went upstairs and slept until 9:30am.

Now I feel pretty much like I have the last couple of days except my fever just started coming back a few hours ago. Hopefully I'll be able to ward off another episode like last night by being more proactive and taking meds before anything gets too far.

On another note, I think God might be protecting me from realizing my fear by allowing me only to get sick at night...when I don't have to be tending to Embry. With the exception of one time, the only times I've gotten sick since having Embry were at night. Even though it terribly inhibits my sleep, I can only be grateful that it doesn't happen at a much more inopportune time.

Wednesday, February 3, 2010


so Embry learned how to open doors on 2/2/10 and this is what she loves to do in her free time (ie any time she's not eating or sleeping)...