Week 23

23 Weeks Old on 4/24/09

I've got quite a long story to share about going to visit Tony's dad with Embry last Sunday. The part I was most worried about, the loooong car ride, was pretty ok. Embry was completely fine there and back until about the last 1/2 hour of each leg of the journey. Then one of us would go sit in the backseat with her and give her a bottle and play with her. She was probably a combo of hungry and bored each time. I know I'd get a little antsy if I had to sit backwards in a car staring at the backseat for 4.5 hours straight.

Ok, so to set the scene: at the prison there's a looong open field with a long driveway into the prison. At the end of the driveway is a small parking lot for visitors. Then there are stairs (probably 40-50) leading from the parking lot up a hill to the prison. So we get there and change Embry's diaper in the backseat and get our gallon ziplock bag packed with 4 diapers, some wipes, a small toy (her plastic keys), and a bottle filled with pumped breastmilk. Then we're walking up the stairs and halfway up there's a bathroom where tony was going to wash his hands, then I notice that there's a big poo stain on the back of Embry's dress. We go back to the car to change her into the other cute outfit I had brought along. Then we go up to the prison to sign in. We get to the door and I realize that I still have my sunglasses on, which isn't allowed, so Tony goes back down to the car to get my regular glasses. While he's gone I fill out the sign in forms and while diong that I realize that I left my ID in my wallet. Then the security guard looks at the gallon ziplock bag and says that the bottle has to be empty. So I go, 'well how do I get the milk in then, because either way it has to be in a bottle?' and he tells me that I can bring in the bottle empty and give them a sealed container of powder formula which they can then open and inspect and give back to me. I tell the guy that since I'm breastfeeding, I have no formula and I pumped the milk specifically for the trip. Then he tells me that maybe I could breastfeed in the visitation room to which I reply, 'if there was one thing I thought you DEFINITELY wouldn't allow, it would be that!' Honestly, that's what I said. I mean, really, there are guys in there that haven't been around women for years much less one who they know has a boobie hidden under a blanket in the same room! Anyhow, he called back to the visitation room and found out that I could bring in my nursing cover and go into a separate room with the door shut and nurse in there. By this time Tony had come back and I told him about my ID but told him to wait till we knew for sure I could nurse inside, then he went back to the car to take the bottle back (after I had Embry eat from the bottle for about 10 minutes outside) and bring my ID and the nursing cover back up. Then we get that squared away and we go to the visitation door again and there's a paper outside listing that you can only have 2 keys on a keyring. So Tony goes back to the car yet again to drop off the rest of his keys. Then right before we go through security, the security guy looks at the ziplock bag and says that normally they don't allow any toys, but if the guys inside the visitation room don't say anything then they'll let me keep them. It specifically says online that you're allowed one small toy, so I don't know why they normally wouldn't let you bring one in and bonus, what kind of a threat do 3 plastic teething keys pose?! So 45 minutes after our arrival, we finally get into the visitation room and then the whole time I'm worried about them telling me my undershirt is too low because it's the same one I wore last time that the made me go back to the car and change. Luckily they didn't say anything about the shirt or the toy! We got 2 pictures taken while we were there, one of Tony's dad and Embry and then one of all 4 of us. I was sweating a bunch while we were outside because it was hot and I was trying to keep Embry entertained, so then I decided she was hungry and took her into the side room to feed her. Well turns out it wasn't sweat, but a whole lot of breastmilk! Good times. Oh then in the middle of feeding her, I unlatched her and set her up to switch sides and she did one of those things where they're crying but no noise is coming out because they're crying so hard and need to take a breath, then she let out a horendously loud wail and I thought for sure one of the guards was going to come in. Luckily, they didn't cuz they would have gotten more than an eye-full. That's pretty much all the excitement that occured on our trip. Told you it was a long story!

Embry has started making a bunch more consonant sounds as of yesterday. She now does B's, L's, H's, G's, P's, and D's. I'm going to scream if she ends up saying 'dada' before 'mama' because I seriously sit here everyday and go 'mamamamamamama' over and over and over again to her. She probably will though because the D sound is easier than the M sound.

We found out that she REALLY likes beach balls at young marrieds on Wed. Our friend's son had a beach ball that he was bouncing in front of Embry and she was just cracking up! I thought it was funny that Tony and I will drive ourselves crazy trying to make her just laugh a little, but then bring out something as simple as a beach ball and she thinks it's hilarious. I quick got my digital camera out and took a video. Her laugh makes me so happy! I thought it was the cutest thing when she started to smile, but laughing is even better!

I have discovered that Bookmans is the best place ever. For those that don't live here, Bookmans is a used book store where you can trade in your books and games and get credit for stuff there. So a couple weeks ago I went and bought a ton of dr seuss books and then yesterday we stopped and got a bunch of Clifford books, some Beatrix Potter books (btw, I watched the movie about her the other day with Renee Zellwegger and I liked it a LOT), some Dr Seuss, and some board books. Also, has anyone ever read 'The Snowman?' I got it in a board book and hello?! Why does the snowman melt in the end?! That's so sad! I've also decided that I could easily write and illustrate children's books, seems easy enough, getting them published would be the hard part.

Embry will be spending her first overnight trip to my parents house tomorrow night while Tony and I go camping. I'm hoping she'll be a good girl and I think she will seeing as she sleeps from 10pm-6am and then goes back to sleep for at least a couple of hours. I just hope I have enough milk pumped, but I'm sending along formula too, just in case.

Week 22

22 Weeks Old on 4/17/09

Embry fell asleep in her jumperoo today, it was adorable. Her little head was squished against the side and she was snoring. Of course I got out all my cameras (video, digital, and the *new* digital slr) and took lots of pictures. I knew she was tired when she was standing in there yawning, but I didn't think she'd actually fall asleep standing up. She's been bouncing around in there like a crazy kid, she really loves it and it makes me happy to see her happy. Here's a short video so you can see how much jumping she does!


Embry has been completely cured of her bottlephobia. On Monday, Tuesday, and half of Wed I exclusively fed her with a bottle. I have to say that anyone who pumps exclusively deserves a lot of praise because it is not an easy task! On top of taking care of a baby, you have to take the time to pump and then clean everything you used in the process. Not to mention, it's pretty rough on the tatas if I do say so myself! Anyhow, she took the bottle right from the start and I learned how great the dr brown's bottles are too. I used 'the green bottle' (a Nuby, the one I bought with a nipple more like a breast) for the first feeding and I could tell that Embry was actually having to suck pretty hard to get the milk out. She does this thing every couple of sucks where she shakes her chin and during those times the bubbles of air would go into the bottle to make it easier to suck. Point is, this never happens with Dr Brown's bottles because she doesn't ever have to come unlatched to let the air into the bottle. Booyah!

Speaking of milk, last week when she was in the nursery during MOPS she was given one of the 'in case of emergency' bottles of formula I have in the diaper bag instead of the milk I had pumped for her. Up until that point, she had been given zero formula what-s0-ever. I was quite proud of that fact. I have to say, I in no way dislike formula...in fact, I think it's darn great! I mean, what did women do before they had formula? What if you couldn't breastfeed for whatever reason or if you adopted...how could you feed your baby...it's a mystery. Point is, I had this weird thing going where I wanted to be able to say, 'my baby never had one drop of formula.' Don't ask me why, I don't know why, that's just the way I felt. So, she was given the formula, but when all was said and done, I don't think she actually drank any of it. This was back in the bottlephobia days and judging from the large cream colored stain on her shirt, none of it actually made it into her stomach.

I discovered a few days ago that if I sat Embry up, she could stay there for about 30 seconds. It was a pretty amazing discovery and I imagine she could have stayed sitting up weeks ago, I just didn't realize it at the time. I had been sitting her up on uneven surfaces up until a few days ago when I sat her up in her crib and *poof* she stayed there. Amazingly, I didn't run to get my camera but that's probably because she wasn't in a super cute outfit. Yes, I'm neurotic. Wait is that the right word...looking it up online..."Also called psychoneurosis. a functional disorder in which feelings of anxiety, obsessional thoughts, compulsive acts, and physical complaints without objective evidence of disease, in various degrees and patterns, dominate the personality." Yes, that's me.

And my sarcasm brings me to another point: My Blog. I've been having quite the struggle with honesty/secrets/being myself (call it what you like) lately. Ever since receiving a rather subjective comment around week 30 of my pregnancy followed by a very disheartening email, I've kept my true feelings on most subjects to myself. I feel that my sarcasm and humor have been completely lost in this blog and I'm sorry to the few people who read along every week for the extremely boring content. There were a million things I wanted to say over the past months, but bit my tongue for fear of being too transparent and possibly hurting feelings or offending others. Although I love my daughter to pieces and could talk about her for days on end, every week when I write this blog I feel like I'm saying 'blah blah blah.' At least inbetween the 'blahs' I'd like to throw in something with perspective about the delights, struggles, and flat out hysteria that comes along with being a mom. I recently heard about this mom who blogged about her journey to and through motherhood and took a no-holds-barred approach...she ended up making tons of money with a huge blog readership which led to book deals and tv appearances. Not that I could ever be remotely that interesting, but I admired that she was able to speak her mind and share her true thoughts with the world even despite receiving lots of critisism for it. So now I wonder if I should just say whatever I want in this blog or start another one somewhere and keep this one just a weekly Embry update or just forget about saying what I want to and continue doing what I've been doing? Then I think about all the stuff I didn't say and how dissapointed I am that all those raw feelings were never expressed or documented, not only for my own selfish reasons but it might have helped someone else in the long run, who knows? Now I sit and wonder if I should delete this entire paragraph. Guess I'll just throw it out there and chalk it up to the 'what's done is done' mentality.

Week 21

21 Weeks old on 4/10/09

Well Embry has another cold. She's had a dry cough since the last time we took her to the dr (about a month ago) and then this morning she woke up with snot all over her face, gurgling, sneezing, and gooing of the eyes. I took her to the dr because I knew that if it was worse tomorrow then I would have felt bad for not taking her in today (otherwise I'd have to wait till monday.) So basically he said her lungs are clear, so it's just a cold. She got her weight taken, with clothes on, and was 15lbs 10oz. I asked if he had any advice for getting her to take a bottle. Other than trying out nipples that are similar to a boob, he didn't have any advice. He said if she's hungry enough, she'll eat to which I said, 'well when my mom is babysitting and Embry is screaming, I'll have her call you.' :)

An incident occured yesterday which I debated telling Tony or not, but decided it was probably best if I did. I put Embry on the couch sideways leaning back in her boppy while I sat on the floor to put away some wrapping paper. I would have put her in her swing or something, but I was about to take her upstairs to change her diaper. Then I get distracted for a minute because some loon on Oprah was talking about mothers telling daughters about vibrators (hello!) and then 'thud.....WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!' As you can imagine, somehow Embry either rolled over or scootched off the couch and fell onto the floor hitting her head on the coffee table in the process. So I picked her up, bounced her around for a sec, then started feeding her at which point she forgot she was even hurt in the first place. I got an icepack to put on her head, but after about a half hour it was barely even a scratch, so I'm guessing there won't be any permanent damage. Obviously I felt really bad, but I'm sure it won't be the last time she bumps her head. I must have really been having a spacey day because I almost overflowed the pool yesterday too, but that's another story.

Embry's tutu and matching headband are complete. I'm not sure I want to have her picture taken when she's sick though. I might take some here at home in the meantime while she gets better. I looked for some baby ballet slippers today at the mall, but did not have any luck. I'm thinking it would be a waste of money to buy some just for a picture anyhow, but it would be a nice finishing touch on her outfit.

She turns 5 months old on Tuesday. When I look back, I can't believe how fast the time has gone. I was just thinking the other day that I wish she could stay this age forever. She's adorable, she sleeps 12 hours a night, she laughs and smiles all the time, she can't really go anywhere (except falling off the couch apparently), she fits into my arms perfectly...I don't know, it just seems like I could live the rest of my life stuck in this time with her and be completely happy.

Week 20

20 Weeks old on 4/3/09

I finally got Embry's 4 month shots on Tuesday. Boy that was an interesting experience! The shot part itself was pretty standard. I held her on my lap and the nurse gave her 3 shots in her right thigh. I thought it might be good to get all her shots in one leg since last time it hurt afterwards when she would move her legs. She cried, but not nearly as much or as loud as last time. I thought she might even be ok without getting fed right afterwards, but I decided to cover my bases and fed her for a few minutes anyway. Good thing too because the nurse had forgotten to have me sign for one of the shots.

The interesting/extremely frustrating part was the waiting to get in. I didn't mind waiting since Embry was really well behaved, but there was a mom and her 2 kids (7 and 6) who sat right next to us. The 2 kids were obviously not feeling well since their voices were hoarse, they keep sniffling, and they were sneezing/coughing. Well, they repeatedly got within an inch of Embry's face (I'm not exaggerating) and talked to her. They were trying to be funny and play with her, but my goodness, I was about to freak out. I'm normally not at all germophoby, but this was a little extreme even for me. So what am I spos to do in that situation? Moving across the waiting room would have been blatantly rude (although it was rude of the mom not to corale her kids in my opinion) and saying something would have caused confrontation (which we all know I'm extremely opposed to.) So yes, I was really confused, hurt, and frustrated by the time we were called into the exam room.

In other news, Embry no longer wants to take her bottle and it is a little bit maddening. She used to not have any issue with taking it, but now she'll just squish the nipple around in her mouth which causes the milk to flow down the side of her face and make a mess. She will suck a few times or if she's super hungry, but I don't know what her deal is. I'm contemplating buying those bottles where the nipples are more like a boob shape, but then I feel like if she doesn't like that either then I'd just be wasting a bunch of money. Also, we're out of size 2 diapers. According to our scale she's 16 lbs now, which is the bottom threshold for size 3, so we just moved her into those tonight. Hopefully they won't leak overnight.

I found a rainforest jumperoo on craigslist today for $45 and when I called the lady I expected it to be gone, but I was the first one who called! So I drove to the middle of nowhere (ie Catalina) and picked it up. Embry loves it, so it was definitely worth the drive! Woohoo!